The schoolies series :-) Part 1

When we go on schoolies, we have to write a short little talk about ourselves - how life was before we became Christians, how and why we became Christians, and what life is like now we are Christians.

Here's my story:

I became a Christian at an early age, but as I got older there were other things that were just as important to me. In primary school I wanted all my teachers to think I was really smart, and so schoolwork was my priority. In high school I really wanted to fit in with the cool group, cos I was often called a nerd. I never forgot I was a Christian, and I thought I was doing pretty well because I went to church and I didn’t swear.

I had a couple of big weaknesses. The first was fear – I have a crazy imagination, can’t watch horror movies – and I often tried to keep busy so I could forget the scary things I thought about. The other weakness was spending a lot of time daydreaming about guys that I liked, because I felt safe and happy.

I started thinking about what I should do with my life when I was about 14 or 15. I wondered what God wanted me to do. I learned from church and from Christian friends that God was interested in and cared about every part of my life – not just work, but friends, family, homework, everything.

Soon after this I began going out with a guy, mostly because I liked the attention he gave me. He also needed my attention, but if he didn’t get it, he’d get upset with me and I’d feel guilty. But I didn’t break up with him right away, because I still wanted the attention.

I went on a camp in June when I was 15, along with this guy and some other school friends. The leaders were talking about how we should be making sure that Jesus was the most important person in our lives, and that began to make sense to me, since I was a Christian. The biggest struggle, though, was knowing that if I really wanted to put Jesus first, I would need to break off the relationship with the guy.

One night at one of the talks on camp, I prayed and told Jesus I was going to make sure He was the most important thing in my life. Then we were told to come to the front of the room if we’d prayed. I argued against it in my mind, until I heard God say to me, “Did you mean what you said?” So I went down the front, I prayed and cried, and I promised Jesus that I would live for Him. I broke up with the guy I’d been going out with and told him I wanted to put Jesus first.

I started reading my Bible regularly, and I suddenly couldn’t get enough of it. It has taught me so much and changed my attitudes, cos I saw that Jesus did things differently – He said things like love God more than anything else, love people, even love your enemies. He also helped me to deal with my fears so that they don’t constantly invade my mind anymore, and I think that slowly but surely He is teaching me how to keep the whole relationships with guys thing in balance.

Jesus has done so much for me – He died on the cross to pay for all the bad things I’ll ever do, think or say. He also forgives me for them. Jesus also came back to life after He died, so now I have a real relationship with Him where I talk to Him and He talks to me. His love is what sustains me through the hard times. One of the biggest things I’ve learnt this year is that God does not control me through guilt and fear – He wants to set me free from those things and motivate me through love instead.